New Year!

2015!! WHAAAT>!!! Where did 2014 go so quickly? I'm sure I'm not the only one that feels this way!! While there is really no point to this blog post. No words of wisdom, or something to teach, just a regular old blog post about how I feel this year is going to go for me and my life. You see.....the last couple New Year's Eve's have been bittersweet for me.....and by bittersweet.....taken some getting used to...haha. Me and my husband were talking about this yesterday. How that while we really never needed an excuse to drink to get obliterated, and fight our little hearts our about things that should never be fought about or even brought up or doing things that put the word shame to shame and not remembering it.....my husband was talking about how "NON-exciting" it felt to get dressed to go to a party, and not that it was a bad thing to be social, which is important, it's just hard being a sober couple and being around alcohol, and going to a party and feeling like we don't fit in any longer.  Don't get me wrong....the ones we were with last night, did NOT make us feel like out casts AT ALL....far from it. Actually....it was the opposite. 3 years ago....we were much more anxious to bring in the new year because of all of the alcohol that would be involved and to us...that was what brought the "life" of the party. Well....things have certainly changed. One....we are now in our mid-thirties, sober, and our bedtime is usually 9pm...haha. Two.....we now realize that alcohol is FAR from what brings the "life" to a party or social gathering, it's actually who you surround yourself with, and the thoughts about life that YOU bring to it, and how you allow your past and present situations to control it.....and Three....life should ALWAYS be celebrated on a much grander scale of things than partying and puking and waking up with no motivation to celebrate life at all.

While I'm am NOW grateful and accept and understand the things I've gone through in life, I am still learning myself. 2014 was definitely a bumpy road. And everyone can say that I'm sure....but honestly...I've learned so much. I feel like something is shifting in my life. Things are more easily letting go. I'm no longer allowing myself to be defined by my past, I now realize that that girl no longer exists. I have discovered who I am, truly.....and I'm confident in my career choice, because I care so much for people. I have a connection and feel a bond to those who have struggled or are struggling to get through things I've gone through myself, or even those who have a totally different struggle, once I feel a connection to someone....I can't help myself....I have to do what I can to help them get through, or succeed. I have ALWAYS been this way.  But this wasn't always a good thing. Being this kind of person, has lead me to some heartache. It made me build huge walls and have NO trust in anyone almost. Not that I didn't care...but my trust was broken. I let this define my character after a while. I felt I was unlovable. I started holding grudges and not forgiving people and started blaming others for not being able to who I truly am. I became selfish. Selfish with myself, my time, and who I thought deserved it, because I didn't want to get hurt again and I felt I would rather just be alone to avoid the pain I just "knew" it would eventually entail. I know better than this. This left me lonely. This began to make me doubt my abilities to help others, because I was stuck in my own prison of not trusting, not forgiving and not moving on. WAKE UP CALL....

2014 has been ALL about wake up calls for me! It has shown me that life is EXACTLY what I focus on! While focusing on being pissed off at people or situations, and focusing on things holding me back, instead of focusing on just being MYSELF, accepting myself, having faith and believing I can be great and help many, many people, I was missing out on life!! 2014 showed me that a life with limitations is created by  thoughts. There is NO one to put limitations on my life without my consent....it was all an illusion I allowed myself to believe! 2014 has definitely taught me that LIFE ALWAYS GOES ON.....no matter what! No matter if someone you love passes away, no matter if you stay stuck on the negative things holding you back and remaining miserable or you break free, open your mind to trying new things, taking control of your life, your thoughts, your values, your choices and you MAKE the decision to change.....it STILL goes on! No one or nothing is going to stop what they are doing...the world is NOT going to stop spinning because we are unhappy, and CHOOSE to remain in a miserable place! Life is about making positive choices......forgetting the negative. Pushing through...even when you feel you no longer can...because honestly....you can! I didn't realize this until 2014 either. I see many people wanting to make these big changes, but they are missing the part where you have to LET GO of the things that aren't allowing you to change. You have to MAKE changes to see changes. It doesn't just happen....and these changes have to be consistent, and they have to come from a place so deep down inside of us to stick. If you want it, but you don't want it THAT bad....it will show.....plain and simple. Life is so much about the ups and downs......staying up through the storms of life. Living the calm inside the storm. Well....I'm so ready to brave the storms in 2015.
I have many goals for 2015. I plan on reaching every single one of them, but if I don't, I realize now that it's not because I'm a failure, or I should just quit. It's because life is about growth. If there is a goal I failed to reach, it means I'm supposed to push harder to reach it. I see it as a stepping stone to success now. I learn, I grow, I get better and better, and I love this life.

I pray that you too have many, many goals and aspirations for 2015. I pray that you too learn to celebrate even the hardships that may come your way, because they are there for a reason.....and they are inevitable. I pray that you love yourself, so that you can love others even more......it's the MOST important thing and I pray for good health for you ane your families!

Much Love,

The Invigorated Soul